Almost all dog breeds were originally bred to do some sort of job. Whether it was herding sheep or cattle, rescuing people from the water, or hunting ducks and foxes, dogs had purposes*. Important ones.
But as they became more and more domesticated and as people realized just how friggin’ cute they were, many dogs became strictly pets as opposed to working members of the family. In other words, most dogs these days are totally lazy moochers who do nothing but eat, sleep, fart, and cuddle.
And we love them for it!
The Museum of English Rural Life decided to celebrate National Dog Day by asking people to share pictures of their pets:
They specifically asked for pictures of dogs who were bred or trained for one job who now do anything but that one job. And oh boy, the Internet delivered.
Winston
This is Winston. He trained to be a guide dog but failed for being too lazy or, officially, ‘low motivation’
Barney
Barney is a Jack Russell Terrier but her only weighs 10 lbs. Even if he could overcome his terror of everything he’s far too little to catch a fox. Instead, he chases and catches his mini tennis ball and begs for cheese.
Buddy
This is Buddy, bred to hunt foxes. Prefers to drink cosmos and have bar nibbles.
Kodi
This is Kodi, he’s a rescue, pretty sure he’s part ridgeback (bred for killing lions) and part obsessive ball chaser who lives in fear of water. Always makes sure you don’t wake up from a nap alone. He’s a good boy.
Cara
This is my Newfoundland dog, Cara. Bred to rescue people from water, she preferred just to lounge in it.
Hudson
This is Hudson the bulldog (once upon a time used for bull-baiting). He prefers snack-waiting, schnoozeling in weird positions, and is deathly afraid of trash bags.
Emmett
Emmett is a foxhound but he’s a lover not a hunter.
Dax
This is Dax (12). He was kicked off a ranch for being a bad cattle herder. Now he herds children and keeps the pillows together.
Newton
This is Newton. He is a poodle- originally bred to hunt ducks in water. He is terrified of water but will keep your feet warm under a desk for hours. Deals with mailman daily.
Edmund
This is Edmund, an English Pointer, bred for working on game shoots. He is a spoiled, idle layabout with absolutely no discipline, a tendency to sod off over the horizon and an unfortunate habit of chasing anything with feathers or fur. We love him lots, the useless sod.
St. Bernard
Saint Bernard, bred to save people lost in the freezing Alps, now excels at laying on top of air conditioning vents, refusing to stand even if you offer her a treat, and occasionally barking at squirrels or at nothing at all.
Mochi
Our rescue pup Mochi is a Terrier mix. She’s very likely part Glen of Imaal Terrier, a gentle breed that was bred for “hard work”…More like “hardly working”!!
Beagle
My wife is constantly telling me that beagles are a working breed. Evidence is lacking…
Amani
Here’s our rescue Shepherd mix Amani. She was bred to herd livestock but is afraid of Yorkies, Pomeranians and pretty much any moving object.
Ebony
Patterdale (plus a bit of poodle) terrier Ebony is meant to be out helping get foxes and badgers. Instead sits around & sometimes even barks at the bird feeder.
Murdoch
This is Murdoch. The legendary “Cú Faoil” or Irish Wolfhound. Bred for hunting wolves, elk and pulling grown men off their horses in battle. These days he’s a professional cuddler, pork chop thief and is surprised by his own farts.
William
William is a dachshund, bred to go down badger and rabbit sets to flush them out. He doesn’t even know how to dig.
Pretzel
Pretzel, also a dachshund, would not know what a rabbit or badger is….but he does like to tunnel under a warm blanket…
Wolfie
This is our German Shepherd Wolfie. A breed best known for its courage, loyalty & guarding instincts. No matter how tired, Wolfie never leaves his post in the window – bravely guarding us from unruly toddlers on scooters and crazed pensioners waiting for the bus.
Corgi
CORGIS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS LAZY, MERL.
Remus
This is Remus, a mini Australian Shepherd, highly intelligent dogs bred to herd. Really enjoys chewing paper and giving kisses.
Archie
Archie, a Cocker Spaniel. Bred to be a gun dog, chasing on command. Barks at the clock.
Lucy
Lucy the Siberian Husky was bred for pulling sleds and listening for danger. Now, the sound of cheese wrappers never escapes her…
Percy
This is Percy, our rescue Saluki x. Salukis are the ‘greyhounds of the desert’, bred to hunt gazelles, etc. In 4 years P has caught one squirrel, which was released, unharmed, from his jaws. Much prefers sleeping, dozing & napping :)
Gregor
This is Gregor, he was bred and trained to be a guide dog for the blind but he was too friendly and got distracted by new friends so he’s now a house pet and he’s thriving.
Kyra
This is Kyra who was bred to ‘spring’ game fowl from moorland. The only practical thing she does now is discovering sources of water, but as we live in Scotland, this isn’t really that useful.
Jed
This is Jed the border collie. Retriever of sticks, destroyer of tennis balls. Bred to herd sheep, excelled at herding bicycles…
Lazlo
My baby boy Lazlo is Hungarian vizsla with a quarter lab! his parents were both working gundogs and he spends all his time wiggling, demanding attention, and being really bad at fetch.
Piper
Piper is a Bernese Mountain Dog. Bred to protect and move herds of cattle. Also a drafting animal…apparently can pull 10x her weight, so…1200 pounds?! She enjoys sleeping at least 19 hours a day. Occasionally moves from bed to couch.
Bonus.
1. Like the cone of shame wasn’t already enough.
2. This is why you don’t buy expensive stuff when you have a cat.
3. “I’m sorry. Were you going to eat that?”
4. “Move human. You’re blocking the TV”.
5. There’s no way you’re leaving the house with shoes on today.
6. Talk about selfishness…
7. Say goodbye to your knees.
8. “Hey, bug off. This is my pizza, pal.”
9. This is what happens when you plan on not sharing your pie.
10. Here’s how you make a good entrance.
11. You thought you were going to work today? Ha!
12. “Mama, do something!”
13. If you were looking for compassion, just forget about it.
14. No omelet for you today.
15. Murderous instincts…
16. When your cat pees on your good pants:
17. And you wondered why you woke up soaked in sweat.
18. Like mornings weren’t hard already.
19. Poor, little baby fighting the heartless enemy.
20. At least she sat on the part you had already completed.
21. This spot is taken. Keep moving if you don’t want scratches on your windows.
22. Obviously there wasn’t any other spot to sit.