If you have a dog, chances are you’ll get it groomed at some point, whether it’s because it gets too hot in the summer or you just want to switch up its ‘do.
Unfortunately, dog grooming is not an exact science — and interpretations of what constitutes a good dogcut can vary wildly. Sorry doggos.
1. When you’re at the spa, awkward and afraid.
You go in looking for a new look, then suddenly you’re in the shower, wet and exposed, and you don’t even recognize yourself in the mirror anymore.
2. Howdy, pardner.
I appreciate the effort here, but c’mon. No dog in the history of dogdom wants to look like Owen Wilson with a droopy cowboy mustache. Cute bandanna though, I guess.
3. When you groom the dog right out of them.
“DROPPED OFF A SHIHTZU, PICKED UP A LLAMA,” writes the person who’s a proud new owner of a llama-tzu. It’s important to give groomers clear instructions.
4. I love cheap thrills.
This Sia-lookin’ doggo don’t need dollar bills to have fun tonight. It would be nice, though, if its hair actually allowed it to see (same goes for Sia herself, really). Form needs to follow function.
5. Sometimes it’s the groomer’s fault. Sometimes, it’s the owner’s.
The Redditor who submitted this really isn’t sure the haircut worked out, and I’m not either. Apparently the owner loves their dog’s weirdly streamlined new shape, though, so I guess it’s all good.
6. When you take the DIY approach.
I know it seems easy to groom a dog — just set the clippers and start clipping, right? — but this poor Newfoundland has traded his awesome coat for some kind of poodle ‘do thanks to his owner’s DIY skills.
7. Such a pretty, pretty, derpy princess.
The luxurious flowing mane and the pink bow really tie this pupper’s new look together. But with that expression, I’m not sure this pretty pupper is quite ready for the dog show runway quite yet.
8. I pity the fool.
Once again, it’s a bit of a shame to see so much work put into making a dog look like an absolute derp. Dogs are not Mr. T. When will people get the message?
9. Take them to the groomer and keep their trust.
This little pupper looks traumatized and distrustful after getting a DIY grooming session. Trust has clearly been broken forever, at least until the treats come out.
10. When a sleek summer ‘do looks more like a perm.
Another DIY grooming fail. This guy didn’t even get an even clipping all over. Just look at him. He’s clearly devastated.
11. When you just love that boxy aesthetic.
Yeah, Minecraft is great and all, but people need to stop trying to make the real world all boxy. Dogs were meant to be dogs, not boxes.
12. When you groom your dog and realize they’re the Jigsaw Killer.
Usually, broken trust results in a wounded expression. But in this case, the expression clearly indicates their owner is going to get murdered in their sleep tonight.
13. “I SAID I WANTED A TRIM.”
I know their long coats can make them really hot in the summer. But there’s a big difference between a nice summer trim and a full-on buzzcut.
14. What abomination have we wrought?
I thought this was just another amateur dog grooming fail, but turns out this kung fu pupper was actually featured at the Westminster Dog Show.
16. This is your brain on drugs.
Some puppers just don’t have a flowing, Aniston-esque locks to pull off the awesome haircuts you see on Pinterest. At least they tried, I guess.